Where I've Been

I've been quiet for quite some time here. I really apologize for that! I really don't like leaving this place neglected it's just that I've been so busy this last month that I haven't been able to find the time or the mental calm to really sit down and write something thoughtful. So, I thought, it's better to write nothing than to write something that's not well thought out.

The good news is now I have lots of time on my hands and plenty of ideas on things I want to write about. So I will!

So you guys know what's been going on and why I've been so quiet:

I was one of the chief people behind planning and executing my department's convocation ceremony. This, I have to say, was easily as much work as my actual classes, especially in the final month or so. It was enormous, lots of people, faculty, tickets to be sold and tracked, money to be accounted for, facilities and services to be negotiated and contracted, dissatisfied people to attend to, ticket shortages... It was a lot of things to handle and a lot of work. It was also very rewarding and something I can put on my resume, which is good.

I've also been spending a lot of time helping people study biological psychology. This was also a lot of work but it helped me really cement my own knowledge of the subject as well as boost a lot of people's grades... significantly, which is good. It also opened doors to me with regards to a position as a teacher's assistant, which is very good. I need to finalize some details with that.

Of course, with all of that going on something had to give. That meant that all those essays and papers which I ought to have been working on for the last month got pushed off until after convocation which meant a huge scramble and around-the-clock work for over a week, which was hell. Even then I didn't get everything done on time, partly because I just had to prioritize one paper over another and partly because especially under stress my memory gets faulty and I forget things, like entire essays. Everything turned out okay in the end, though, which is also good.

Then I fell asleep and slept for days. I'm still on the verge of constant fatigue and I probably will be for some time.

I suppose one can only do so much. There's only so much one can "work just a little bit harder" before they can't work anymore. At some point, one is going to fail. I suppose what with having executive functioning impairments I find myself goading that threshold far too often--taking on work which I can barely accommodate so that I can tell myself that I'm not "just lazy."

So these last few weeks that's what I've been doing. I've accomplished a lot; I made it through my finals; and, in parts, I came up short. I suppose I should learn a lesson or something from this.

Lather, rinse, repeat...